I’m not sure if my giving I’m-interested-in-you signs to Chatty Guy is going that well. I sent a global email about Secret Santa presents to a few people during the week, and he replied (the only one to do so) in a slightly cheeky way asking if I could get his gift for him. A few emails then went back and forth between us, friendly and jokey, but not really flirty.
Then the other evening I was checking a couple of messages on a social networking site and noticed that he was logged in too. I spent a while wondering whether to make some sort of contact, and finally plucked up the courage to start a chat with him. I then spent an anxious couple of minutes staring at the screen waiting for him to reply, and thinking that maybe I’d scared him off. He did reply though and we chatted for a bit. Again, nothing particularly flirty, but I guess at least I managed to initiate the chat, he didn’t ignore me and it did last for longer than one message each.
I feel like such a novice at all of this. Other women seem to be naturally able to flirt with men they like or to somehow let them know they’re interested, while I’m spending ages trying to work out what I should do and how I should act, and then attempting to put that into practice.
Should it just come naturally? Should I just know how to show a guy I’m interested? Will I get better at it with experience? Or are all those experienced flirty women actually working very hard to do and say the right things and underneath it all feeling exactly the same as me?
I’ve actually searched the internet for tips on how to show someone I like them, but there is a part of me that feels that doing things such as deliberately amending your body language because a website suggested it is a little false. Although obviously not doing such things hasn’t got me anywhere so far, so maybe I need to give it a go.
On a completely different note I had a notification from the social networking site which was amusing in a perverse kind of way. An old schoolfriend of mine, who I haven’t seen for at least 16 years, answered a question about me in a quiz.
The question was “Do you think [my full name] is still a virgin?”
Her answer was no.
If only.
5 comments:
You know what saneandsingle made me realize today? That I'm in the exact same boat as her...and it turns out that you're in the same boat as well...though, I doubt that Chatty Guy, in this case, is younger than you...if he is, then we're REALLY in the same boat.
Weird how that happens, isn't it?
Anyways, your comment about not naturally knowing how to flirt was interesting because up until recently, I thought I was really bad at flirting, too...until I realize that I flirt quite often with guys I'm completely uninterested in.
What most people consider flirting, I always thought was just smiling, teasing and giving someone more attention than usual...in other words, it was flirting!
Anyways, there's this woman named Tracy Cox who wrote a book called "Super Flirt." It's a fun read. You might want to get it if you're looking for tips.
I've been reading Saneandsingle's blog and yours and thinking to myself that it's a little strange that we're all in the same kind of situation. And Chatty Guy is younger than me, by 6 years, so yes we are really in the same boat.
When I think about it, I do find that teasing and giving attention to guys I'm not interested in comes fairly naturally, I just hadn't thought of it as flirting.
Thanks for the info on Tracy Cox's book - she's presented a couple of quite interesting TV programmes about relationships here in the UK, so I think I'll try to get hold of the book.
you know i just realised that i'm in the same situation too! though in my case cutie aussie colleague has recently left to go back to the homeside and i won't see him for an indefinite period of time. but he was younger too... by 3 years...
and i'm not sure if i'm good at flirting but i think maybe i'm better at it when i'm not interested in the guy. when i'm interested in someone i just turn into this shy or rambling mess. doesn't exactly say confident hot woman haha!
I tend to turn hugely shy when I'm interested in someone too - I either sit there in silence desperately trying to think of something interesting to say or end up saying something idiotic, just because I had to break the silence.
And what is going on with this whole younger men thing?
younger men are hot! i blame my mom for this... my dad is younger than her by 2 years. it's in the genes! haha!
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